Pickles & Dimes » Half-Asleep Jason http://picklesanddimes.com A blog featuring a disturbing amount of bacon references. Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:28:26 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 Finally http://picklesanddimes.com/2011/10/24/finally/ http://picklesanddimes.com/2011/10/24/finally/#comments Mon, 24 Oct 2011 21:22:49 +0000 Shauna http://picklesanddimes.com/?p=2208 It’s been awhile since Jason talked in his sleep. His last few episodes were just loud moans punctuated by random kicking and flailing, which made having a queen-sized bed very unfortunate. Last week he was finally agitated enough to talk.

Jason: [SCREAMS while kicking madly]

Me: Hey!

Jason: NRRRRAAAAAAAAAAGH! [more kicking, plus punches]

Me: Shorty-I mean Jason, wake up! (I was dreaming about Shorty)

Jason, muttering unintelligibly: Something something something?

Me: Are you awake? What are you asking?

Jason, still muttering unintelligibly, but with a definite rise in his voice at the end so his muttering appears to be a question: Something something SOMETHING?

Me, annoyed: Whatever it is you’re asking, the answer is no.

Jason: [quiet]

Me: [rolls eyes]

Jason, suddenly: HEE HEE HEE!!! Now they’re in the f—ing ditch! (Editor’s note: He actually said the words, “HEE HEE HEE.” It was very odd.)

Me: Argh!

Jason: [sound asleep]

Me: [wide awake]

]]> http://picklesanddimes.com/2011/10/24/finally/feed/ 4 I didn’t – I’m a Mountain Dew gal http://picklesanddimes.com/2011/09/09/i-didnt-im-a-mountain-dew-gal/ http://picklesanddimes.com/2011/09/09/i-didnt-im-a-mountain-dew-gal/#comments Fri, 09 Sep 2011 17:21:54 +0000 Shauna http://picklesanddimes.com/?p=2163 A few nights ago:

Jason, sleeping: mumblemumblemumblemumble COKE!

Me: Bwah?

Jason, louder: mumblemumblemumblemumble COKE!!

Me: Jason, what?

Jason, practically shouting: DON’T DRINK ALL THE COKE!!!

Me: Okay! Geez.

Jason: zzzzzzzzzzz.

]]> http://picklesanddimes.com/2011/09/09/i-didnt-im-a-mountain-dew-gal/feed/ 6 Next time he’ll probably dream about being gummed by bunnies http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/10/19/next-time-hell-probably-dream-about-being-gummed-by-bunnies/ http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/10/19/next-time-hell-probably-dream-about-being-gummed-by-bunnies/#comments Tue, 19 Oct 2010 16:52:37 +0000 Shauna http://picklesanddimes.com/?p=1920 Sunday, 3:00 a.m.:

Jason, sleep-talking: AAHHHHH! No!

Me: Wake up, Jason!

Jason: AAARRRGH!

Me: Jason, you’re dreaming. Wake up!

Jason: Get off me!

Me: You’re having a nightmare – it’s OK!

Jason: Squirrels are biting my neck!

Me: Um, OK. But it’s just a dream!

Jason, flailing: AAAAAH! Here comes another one!

The next morning:

Me: You talked in your sleep again.

Jason: I did?

Me: Yeah. You were pretty agitated.

Jason: Oh yeah! Baby alligators were biting my feet!

Me: Yea…wait, no. Squirrels were biting your neck.

Jason: Huh? I don’t remember that. I remember trying to climb up a steep, muddy hill and baby alligators were trying to bite my feet.

Me: Wow, that…is actually pretty horrifying.

Jason: Every time I’d climb up the hill, I’d slide back down.

Me: How come you dream about relatively harmless animals trying to attack you? Like the time a skunk ran backwards on your chest to spray you?

Jason: I don’t know, but that dream was scary.

Me: And now squirrels and baby alligators.

Jason, defensively: Well, adult alligators were in my dream, too. They were just hanging back and watching.

]]> http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/10/19/next-time-hell-probably-dream-about-being-gummed-by-bunnies/feed/ 7 Sunday! http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/10/05/sunday/ http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/10/05/sunday/#comments Tue, 05 Oct 2010 18:57:08 +0000 Shauna http://picklesanddimes.com/?p=1910 Scene: Sunday morning, 5:05 a.m. I get up to feed the cats.

Jason: Change my alarm!

Me, half asleep: What?

Jason: I need to go in early.

Me, realizing: It’s Sunday.

Jason: I don’t want to be late!

Me: It’s Sunday!

Jason: I have to be in by 6:00.

Me: Jason. It’s SUNDAY!

Jason: Shhhh.

Me: Are you shushing me?!?

Jason: Zzzzzzz.

]]> http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/10/05/sunday/feed/ 8 to be fair, his language is only this bad when he’s asleep http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/03/12/to-be-fair-his-language-is-only-this-bad-when-hes-asleep/ http://picklesanddimes.com/2010/03/12/to-be-fair-his-language-is-only-this-bad-when-hes-asleep/#comments Fri, 12 Mar 2010 15:04:06 +0000 Shauna http://picklesanddimes.com/?p=1684 This morning, 2:30 a.m.:

Jason: Ahhhh! Get away from me, you (bleep)er!

Me: Huh? Wha?

Jason: The (bleep)ing giant lizard is trying to bite me!!

Me: Heh heh.

Jason, after a long pause: Ow! It bit me!

Me, giggling: Oh. Are you OK?

Jason, after a long, long, looooong pause: (Bleep)er.

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