Welcome to Minnesota! Land of 10,000 Lakes and Deep-Fried Things!

These were freaking delicious. Seriously: sheer perfection.

It was a perfect, blue-sky kind of day.

Jason took all of these photos. This one is my favorite.

Minnesota’s own version of the Space Needle. Only not as cool.

Baby ducks!

The gangster mascot of The Great Minnesota Get Together, Fairchild. Dude had attitude.

We ate dinner here. Battered and deep-fried alligator nuggets with alligator-shaped fries.

You can’t tell in the picture, but there were angels singing. And why wouldn’t they be? Thick-cut bacon carmelized in maple syrup, yo!

Our food tally:

- Frozen chocolate-covered banana (Shauna)
- Cheese curds (shared)
- Teriyaki buffalo jerky (shared, plus we went back and bought two more packs because it was THAT GOOD)
- Chocolate shake (shared)
- Alligator nuggets (both)
- Mountain Dew (shared)
- Root beer (shared)
- Big Fat Bacon (both)

We really wanted some Sweet Martha’s Cookies and I had a craving for cotton candy for some reason, but we persevered. I never saw the Fry Dog, but my brother had one and said it was just OK.

See you next year!

This is my favorite time of day, for a few reasons:
1. I’m done with work
2. It’s light out now when I’m done with work
3. And, the light looks like that

It’s so pretty and simplistic: trees made of silhouettes and the sky made of blues, oranges, pinks and purples. I just love it.

I have some kind of tooth issue that I am ignoring, inasmuch as one can ignore shooting pain when chewing on the affected side, random cheek tingling and extreme facial sensitivity. I’m sure it’s nothing.

I am going through my 2nd cookbook looking for new recipes, and it’s called The Newlyweds Cookbook. It’s so sweet and cute and not true to life because the recipes break down the duties, like this:

He does: Cuts the chicken breast into bite-sized pieces…

She does: Brings the chicken mixture to a boil, stirring often…

Whatever. Jason & I get all irritated with each other if we’re both in the kitchen at the same time, because we have a smallish kitchen and it’s not conducive to being toe-to-toe with someone when boiling water and exact measurements are involved. There’s a lot of “excuse me’s” and “watch out, boiling water coming through’s” and “are you sure that’s enough onion powder” comments, and it never ends well. So here’s our version.

Whenever Jason cooks, I:

Play floor hockey with the cats (they’re surprisingly nimble)

And whenever I cook, Jason:

Catches up on emails.

It’s win-win.

My favorite recipe from this cookbook, the one that made me exclaim “WHAT?!?” and curse my laziness at not noticing it sooner: Bacon-Wrapped Chicken in Cream Sauce. Yeah!

Bacon flowchart

Gummy bacon

Bacon gumballs

Bacon salt

How to make a Bacon weave

Bacon bandages

Bacon wallet

Bacon gift boxes (includes the t-shirt: “Bacon is Meat Candy”)

Watch this hilarious jim gaffigan bacon bit

Bacon air freshener

Plush bacon

Bacon floss

Bacon mints

Bacon beans

Bacon placemats

Bacon lunchbox

Bacon pennant

Bacon spinner game

Bacon toothpicks

Bacon costume

Bacon cookbook

And don’t forget to wrap your gift in this.

Happy Bacon Holidays!

First off, Spam, the great Minnesota staple.

Now how about some Norwegian hotdish on a stick? (Jason’s mom tried it. It was deep-fried meatballs and tater tots. Mmmmm.)

OK, let’s dive into some pickle rollups:

Now, let’s try my absolute favorite: deep-fried alligator. I thought about taking a picture of the nuggets and the gator-shaped fries but then thought, “Screw it, I’m starving.”

You just know good things are about to happen when you see this:

This thing was to die for. Bacon on a stick caramelized with syrup. YES, PLEASE.

This thing, not so much. Stupid chocolate-covered bacon with salt. GROSS. And overpriced. It never happened, OK? IT NEVER HAPPENED.

Later, I visited the butterfly house and got a “tattoo”:

Then The Thing got ready for the Brad Paisley concert:

And finally, for Shelly:

MMMMMMM.

Final food total (over 9 hours):

- Alligator nuggets with gator-shaped fries
- Half of a chocolate malt
- One bite of the chocolate-covered bacon
- One Sweet Martha’s chocolate chip cookie that I paid a stranger $2 for because I really only wanted ONE cookie, not the giant cup or bucket
- Half of a Big Fat Bacon
- Two root beers
- Two Cokes
- Half a bag of mini donuts

(I actually feel I showed some restraint this year.)

The Minnesota State Fair starts tomorrow and both Jason & I took Friday off so we could go to the Brad Paisley concert and gorge ourselves on alligator nuggets (seriously, I love the alligator nuggets SO MUCH). The Thing will be accompanying us this year, which I am strangely happy about. Also, awhile ago my mom sent me an email with the subject, “Hey crazy bacon lady,” telling me that there will be TWO new bacon foods at the fair this year: The Pig Licker (chocolate-covered bacon sprinkled with sea salt) and the Big Fat Bacon (1/3 lb. of fried bacon covered with maple syrup. On a stick, of course). Looks like I’ll have to sample both – in the name of science, naturally.

Also, I hear there will be Pickle Pops: frozen pickle juice in a push-up sleeve. Fantastic. I better start training for my culinary descent into Fair Food Frenzy.

It’s now only 3:39. Alert the media! I have apparently found the Fountain of Youth. It exists here within the bowels of Workplace, where you never age BECAUSE TIME NEVER MOVES FORWARD.