Pickles & Dimes

I’ve been feeling putzy lately for no good reason whatsoever, which makes me feel even more putzy. “Putzy” is our term for a blah kind of day, one where nothing specifically negative happens, but you feel crappy nonetheless. When one of us feels this way, we come home from work and request an extra-long hug with extra-tight squeezes because of the “putzy.”

One reason for the putzy:
We got 5 new goldfish last week after the last of our 7-year-old goldfish died. All that was left in our aquarium was the godawful, creepy, prehistoric-looking algae eater. (Seriously, that damn thing is the size of a freaking stapler. I have been known to stare horrified at it while trying to determine if it’s still alive only to be startled into a panicky shout when one of the cats brushes up against me.)

So, old goldfish dead, creepy algae eater lurking in empty tank. Unacceptable. We got 5 new goldfish, all in various colors and from various pet stores (because they constantly tell us 1 or 2 goldfish is plenty for our nearly 30-gallon tank and if we get more we are FISH MURDERERS). (Never mind the fact that we had 5 goldfish in there previously that lived for nearly 7 years and grew to the size of chalkboard erasers.) (I am not sure why I keep comparing the size of our fish to office supplies.) (Help me.)

The first three fish we got seemed fine. So a few days later, we got another two. Then, a few days after that, I noticed white spots on some of the fish. Our water was as good as it could be, although the pH level was a bit high (as it usually is). Despite conditioning the water and attempting to lower the pH, 4 of the fish died this morning. In addition to the white spots (related to ich), they also appeared to have fin and tail rot (exactly what it sounds like). One of the fish was still alive, although he looked like he was two fin shakes from death, but I couldn’t bear to dispose of him, so we’ll see what he looks like tonight.

There are a million reasons why the fish could’ve died: our water could’ve been contaminated with some kind of bacteria (despite a water change), the new fish were too small to adapt to the higher pH, one of the new fish could’ve had something, the water was full of something evil being secreted by the algae eater (which explains its immunity), blah blah blah. Believe me, I’ve researched the hell out of what’s happened. But it’s still sort of depressing. Especially since we basically plopped the original 5 fish into the tank without a second thought and they lived for over 7 years. Bah. So I guess the fish store people are right: We are fish murderers.

Things that are combating the putzy:
The weather. I have been on the hunt for a new fall jacket (Jason says my 15-year-old suede jacket is no longer “fit for public viewing”) but since I am unwilling to pay $100 for a stupid coat, I haven’t found anything. That’s OK, since a few days ago it was 84 degrees out. I am still wearing short sleeves to work. This cold-weather reprieve is fantastic – for my mind and soul. And my checkbook, since I haven’t been forced to buy a coat yet. The weather also means that we still have our summer furniture outside. Whenever we have to put it into storage for the winter, I always feel strangely sad. Pushing that day back as long as possible makes me feel better.

Shortstop Enterprises. After months of joking about it, I bought Shorty a whiteboard. You read that right – a whiteboard. For our dog. He uses it to write up ideas for his new business, Shortstop Enterprises, along with other pearls of his canine wisdom. Here’s what he’s done so far:

Suggested a pumpkin-carving design:

Determined his company’s value proposition. Step 1. Steal underpants. Step 2. […] Step 3. Profit.

It’s silly and goofy and stupid, but it makes us laugh. And it helps beat down the putzy.

How do you deal with the putzy?