stuff
I am still figuring out the idiosyncrasies of my car. The first day, I turned on the back windshield wiper, thinking, “Cool! I have never had a rear windshield wiper before. This is delightful.” Then I spent the next 15 minutes trying to figure out how to turn it off. After 10 miles of listening to “SCREEEEEEE SCREEEEEEE SCREEEEE” as the wiper scraped across my dry windshield, I finally had to pull into a gas station and consult the owner’s manual.
The blind spots are completely different in this car, too. The seat headrests are abnormally tall, so even if I crane my head all the way around, it still leaves a decent chunk of space where I cannot see if someone is about to plow into me. I’m terrified I’m going to change lanes, get hit by someone, and total my car all before the first payment is due.
And, the key fob has lock/unlock buttons on it, but they only work sporadically. When I met the lovely Emily last weekend for pancakes, she got to witness my ineptitude as I tried to leave and instead of unlocking the doors, the car just kept beeping at me. If she hadn’t seen me pull up in the car, it would’ve appeared that the car was not mine and that I was insane.
In other news, we have two identical, giant spiders building webs in our backyard, one hidden behind the garage, and the other blatantly positioned so that every time I go outside with Shorty, I forget all about it and obliterate its web with my head. The spider is very large and reddish and horrifying, with spiky appendages on its legs and a large body probably filled with venom, and no amount of Googling (omg, I cannot unsee the spider bite photos!) has led to its classification, so of course I am assuming it is some new, poisonous species that is plotting my death, and every time I destroy its carefully designed web with my careless meandering, it gets angrier and angrier and makes architectural adjustments so that when I walk into its web for the 15th time, I won’t be able to escape and the spider can then eat me at its leisure.
We are going to the State Fair this weekend, and I want to try a new food item this year, so my first choice was the Chicken-Fried Bacon, but then I realized it’s going to be 90 degrees, and deep-fried food with gravy + high heat and humidity = probably not too good. So we’ll see. Otherwise, the grilled marshamallow, chocolate and banana sandwich sounds good. Or the Camel on a Stick. (Seriously.) Also, if there’s not too big of a line, I totally plan on avenging last year’s sports anchor performance by talking faster and shedding my Minnesotan accent.
What are you doing this weekend?
A- I’m still finding new things my car does/doesn’t do and I’ve had it for 3 years (almost 4) now. It’s kind of pathetic.
B – my key fob has started randomly not locking (or unlocking) the driver side door. All my other doors lock/unlock as they should. Just not the one I acutally use.
C- my roommate’s car has very annoying blind spots and whenever I drive it for her I am TERRIFIED I will total it. The only time I can actually see what I’m doing in her car is when the top is down. And I hate when the top is down. That whole sun aversion thing.
D- We also have random spider webs all over that I don’t see until I walk into them, and then even worse…they stick to me ALL DAY and I can’t seem to get them off. And I have the creepy-crawly feeling all day. It is bad. I too believe these spiders are plotting my demise.
E- that sandwich sounds AMAZING. Eat two (one for me!).
F- I do believe my comment is now longer than your actual post. I guess I shall stop now…
Comment by sarah — August 27, 2010 @ 11:51 am
You’ll get used to the blind spot. I was worried about our car when we first got it because there’s a big gap between the front and back doors that creates a blind spot but I very quickly learned how to angle my head when turning to look around it and it’s never been a problem.
Good luck!
Comment by Jess — August 27, 2010 @ 12:15 pm
You called me “lovely” and just made my entire day! I maintain that it is the fob that is faulty and not the lovely you.
SO SO SO SO jealous you are going to “THE FAIR”!!! Please think of me all day and say “Boy Emily would have loved this”. Next year I promise I will be at THE FAIR! Do you hear me world? I will be there!
Comment by Emily — August 27, 2010 @ 12:34 pm
State Fair!! I’m so excited. Pigs, elephant ears, caricatures, and giant tractors. Could there be anything more awesome in the world?
Comment by NGS — August 27, 2010 @ 1:28 pm
I’m so jealous of your State Fair!!!
We are gathering with the others who live on our block at our neighbors house for a bbq/horseshoe (for the men) tournament. I am not sure how much I want to see my neighbors totally drunk.
Comment by Shelly — August 27, 2010 @ 4:00 pm
Camel on a stick? Really? ‘Cause all that comes to mind is a deep-fried cigarette. Although then again, they DO deep-fry just about anything at the Fair …
Comment by RockyCat — August 30, 2010 @ 8:58 am
I’ve always wanted a rear-windshield wiper!! I’ll make sure if I ever have one to read manual before operating.
Have fun at the fair! Two words: FUNNEL CAKE.
Comment by amber — August 31, 2010 @ 9:10 pm