the office
Work is doing its best to make sure I will be glad to leave it for good next week. My computer is so slow I had time to tie my shoes, grab a drink and go to the bathroom before it opened up a file. The copier has already jammed on me twice. Unrelated, my blood pressure is rising.
Also, channeling Michael Scott from The Office: “It’s my two-week notice, I have immunity.” Why are people still giving me work? God, it’s like I’m still required to earn my keep or something.
I started cleaning out my desk yesterday, not that it was messy (weekly quip from the I.T. guy: “Your desk is insanely clean. Do you even DO any work?”) but because there was a ton of paperwork in my file drawer that I had mysteriously accumulated and even more mysteriously, kept.
And you know what? I needed none of it.
You know what else? I am offended by the colored plastic paperclips. Whenever I see one, I pull it off the paper, bend it so it’s useless, and then throw it away. I know this is wasteful but I cannot help myself. They are worthless to me.
Also? What is the deal with the giant binder clips? Does anyone ever use these? These things are large enough to clips together two reams of paper, and yet I found 16 of them in my desk drawer. (The smaller clips, however, are extremely useful. Other ways I have utilized them: as chip bag sealers, photo holders, and emergency hair clips.)
I have a mug in my drawer that is filled with only pennies. Approximate value: $1.32.
I have a scary amount of half-filled notebooks scattered around my desk space. And because I insist on using Sharpies, every other page is unusable because the ink bleeds through. I am an epic tree-killer.
I am responsible for 58% of 3M’s profit margin on Post-it Notes. They are everywhere.
That reminds me, I need to hit the office supply closet before I leave. (To replenish my desk for the next person, of course.)
What are your favorite/least favorite office supplies?
Two words: Sharpie Pens. They don’t bleed like a very sharpie and they are fantastic! My husband remarked “This is a nice pen!” words I’ve never heard uttered from his mouth before. I was forced to share my two-pack with him and my life will never be the same. Kidding, kind of.
I love office supplies. All of them. I miss having a corporate card without a budget and I could buy whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.
Comment by Shannon — March 27, 2009 @ 9:20 am
That reminds me of a coworker who took a whole box of office supplies on her last day. When she stopped by security on her way out to drop off her badge, they checked the contents of the box she was carrying. Duh!
Comment by My Buddy Mimi — March 27, 2009 @ 9:28 am
I use those big binder clips! I have a bunch of giant construction plans in my office. They arrive to me all rolled up and fastened with an elastic, which I find messy and unmanageable, so I have a student fold them and then use one of those clips to keep the projects together.
Comment by LoriD — March 27, 2009 @ 9:47 am
I have to use those huge binder clips sometimes. I hate it when I have to bust one of those puppies out because it means the proposal is gigantic and horrible and life-sucking.
I love highlighters and pop-up post-its. Couldn’t live without my pop-up dispenser!!
Comment by nonsoccermom — March 27, 2009 @ 10:26 am
I love paper clips and post-it notes. That really what keeps my life going. I don’t know if I could survive on anything else. Also, labels and folders. I don’t really have a system other than that.
Comment by kirida — March 27, 2009 @ 10:38 am
I use those huge binder clips. It’s the all that damn government work. They send over huge piles of paperwork, 500-page strategic plans, etc. It’s a huge pain in my ass. But those clips hold it all together.
Comment by Jess — March 27, 2009 @ 10:47 am
Every single one of those pennies must have a wonderful story
Comment by Parkingathome — March 27, 2009 @ 10:53 am
Man, I spent so much time preparing my office and work for my replacement in DC. I was leaving at quite possibly the worst time of the year for my position, but grad school wouldn’t wait. I left work on my last day at 9:30 p.m. Jesus.
I am a sticky-note hoarder. I have a problem. I LOVE THEM. LOVE.
Comment by Artemisia — March 27, 2009 @ 11:24 am
I have to admit …. I love the little plastic colored paper clips, haha.
Comment by Beyond A Mommy — March 27, 2009 @ 11:44 am
Sticky notes. STIIICKY NOTES. I use them. FOR EVERYTHING. I don’t know why I even HAVE a computer, when 99% of my body of work is sitting on a sticky note somewhere.
Comment by Tessie — March 27, 2009 @ 12:46 pm
My office uses the giant binder clips for timecards. In fact, I wish they made a bigger size! And my personal fave is sticky notes. I have them all over my desk.
Comment by Shelly — March 27, 2009 @ 1:13 pm
The pop-up sticky notes…LOVE them.
Comment by julie — March 27, 2009 @ 1:17 pm
OH…back when I had an office…it was COVERED in sticky notes. People would cringe when they saw my computer screen surrounded with notes (along with the walls…). I also love highlighters which I swear my company HATES b/c I can never find any!!!
Comment by sarah — March 27, 2009 @ 2:37 pm
Green pens… I love my green pens. And these little note pads – I have no way to describe these. They are not post it notes and it is not a full sized paper tablet. They are these little… note pads.
Comment by Christina — March 27, 2009 @ 8:09 pm
i miss my office job because office supplies are so danged expensive. i love those tiny 4X6 legal pads. i really loved the comb binding machine because i could make interesting bound books and journals when my boss was out of town, allowing my scrapbooking skills to shine.
i am reading your archives because i just discovered you and i am bored. i have a good recipe for chicken and dumplings that was passed down to me from my grandmother. she swore me to secrecy because it involves rotisserie chicken, water, chicken bouillon, salt/pepper and tortillas. she would get water boiling, add bouillon, salt/pepper and chicken. after that had boiled for a while on a rolling boil, she would tortillas cut up into small squares/strips. then she turned the heat down and let them get all puffy. you can make it thick like an entree or thin like a soup. you can make it in under 20 minutes, start to finish. she encouraged me to use rotisserie chicken in any recipe requiring chicken because it shaves all the chicken prep time off. almost all my recipes now start with a pre-cooked chicken. you are now sworn to whatever secrecy is left after it being posted on the internet. it sounds gross but it tastes like grandma’s love.
Comment by elle — March 28, 2009 @ 7:42 pm
I love those yellow legal pads. I write EVERYTHING on them.
I’m with you on colored paper clips. They make me feel like I’m in FOURTH GRADE or something.
Hey, are you taking any time off between jobs? And since I haven’t said it yet: CONGRATS on the new job!
Comment by erin — March 29, 2009 @ 8:00 am
ha! i have no emotional response either way to colored paper clips. i do love those colored arrow doohickeys, though, like little mini flag shaped post its? SO useful.
Comment by Alice — March 29, 2009 @ 5:05 pm
My former boss hated all paper clips with a burning passion, such that I had to replace them with binder clips on every paper that came in for him. Which eventually lead to my own hatred of paper clips. Wasteful indeed, but paper clips do pretty much suck.
Comment by Jill — March 30, 2009 @ 9:00 am
I hate the colored paper clips too because they don’t seem to work as well (I don’t think they are as flexible). I use a LOT of post it notes, and the smaller note pads, and “sign here” stickers. What I could really use and don’t have is either a printer or a label maker that would make multi-line labels (like for a name and address) when you are only printing one at a time. Our printer will obviously print labels, but the paper gets all gray, so if you are only printing one it is kind of a waste.
Comment by Becky — April 5, 2009 @ 10:41 am
I never thought I would say this but I totally miss having a desk and working at it. I love office supplies and I’m sorry but the color coated paperclips are the absolute best!
Just found your blog and am enjoying reading through the posts.
Comment by Katrina — April 6, 2009 @ 8:31 pm
some office supplies are low quality that is why you should always check your store if they offer high quality products -:;
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