Pickles & Dimes

Overheard this weekend while lying in our tent at 6:15AM:

Jason: “What are you doing with your eyes open at this time of the morning?”

Shauna: “…just trying to listen to everything, baby.”

No kidding.

I don’t Twitter and never will, but IF I DID, I would have to record what I just did:

Just put a stack of yellow mini post-it notes in my mouth because I thought it was a piece of cheese.

I managed to have the trifecta of anxiety dreams last night, starting with giant tornadoes destroying the Earth, followed by crazed, stab-happy murderers cornering me in a dark hallway, and capped off by me having to use a bathroom stall without a door. These are all recurring dreams, people. Especially the bathroom-without-a-door one. My subconscious is apparently deeply concerned with Mother Nature, dying via sharp objects and peeing in public.

Now that it’s Friday, I can barely remember the struggle that was this workweek; how Monday felt like a giant, squirming, jugular-hunting, 10-legged hellbeast I was trying to push up an oily, jagged, tumbleweed-covered hill to stuff into a too-small burlap sack and toss into a dark, murky river. Today I’m digging my heels into the sprinting workday so I can enjoy my languorous descent into a pleasant-filled weekend. There will be a hammock, many attempts to overcome my ridiculous cribbage game deficit, some reading and s’mores. Lots of s’mores.

We finally signed up for DVR. Don’t tell anyone, but we were still using a VCR to tape shows. Which kept eating the tapes. Which made us mad. But then we finally realized DVR is only $16/month. And after I had to make three phone calls to Comcast to ask 9,000 questions about it, let’s hope we can figure out how to use it:

Comcast: You can record two pre-recorded shows and watch a third pre-recorded show at the same time, but if you’re watching a live show, you can only record one pre-recorded show at the same time.

Me: Uhhh…

Comcast: Does your DVD/VCR have pass-through capabilities?

Me: Uhhh…

Comcast: Input/output into your TV?

Me: Uhhh…never mind. Tape-eating VCR is JUST FINE.

Out of the clear blue nowhere, I am obsessed with the candy bar Whatchamacallit. And my snack desires usually run toward the salty kettle chip variety. And yet: Whatchamacallit – I must have one.

What’s your latest snack obsession?

I am such a creature of habit. I love doing the same thing on the same day of the week (No-TV Wednesdays), I love going camping at the same places every summer, and I love seeing things from my past come back into my life periodically. It makes me really happy.

Like this dress:

I bought this dress at Ann Taylor back in 1999. I remember feeling all fancy paying good money for it. And, it’s a size 6. Note: I am not a size 6 anymore. But this dress still fits. It’s my go-to dress for weddings, funerals, feeling spunky at work, whatever. A little pick-me-up that never goes out of style. And last weekend I was a bridesmaid in a nice outdoor wedding where the bride said, “Just wear a black dress.” DONE.

Our backyard ducks:

They’re back. We had them last year for awhile and they’re living in our yard again. I scared them away earlier with my aggressive picture-taking and polite conversations asking them to leave for 30 minutes so we could mow the lawn, but they returned. The female always arrives first, strutting gracefully, while the male makes his wobbly landing right next to our raspberry bush.

This dude:

I am eagerly awaiting more of these. I think it’s a cecropia moth caterpillar. This guy lived colorfully in our bushes last year, and every day I’d check his hiding spot to make sure he was comfortable. He was HUGE and very easygoing; I named him Harold. I hope he told his buddies all about our nice yard accommodations.

And finally, the godforsaken seashells:

They keep showing up. I have literally reduced the size of our bushes by 90%, and there is NO WAY a seashell would go unnoticed. But yet I am still finding them.

Maybe they’re from the ducks.