Traffic Elimination Center® – Vol. 9
You know how sometimes during rush hour, traffic gets backed up into the intersection even though the light is still green? Yeah, that happens sometimes. It blows, you wait, eventually you move on. (Or blog about it.)
But here’s what I don’t get and what drives me INSANE:
There’s always ONE car that will still pull into the intersection while the light is green, even if there’s nowhere to go and no hope of making it to the other side before the light changes, like this (note the red car):
I saw this happen yesterday. And do you know what the woman in the red car (OH YES, it was a WOMAN; it’s ALWAYS a woman, dammit) did?
She honked. At the car in front of her.
A car that scooted 3 inches forward because that’s all the room they had.
Which still left her stupid ass smack in the middle of the intersection.
Which is where she was still sitting when the light turned green for the cars going the other direction. You don’t know how badly I was hoping for someone to ram her car so it would burst into giant, orangey flames. Stupid Minnesota Nice!
BUT THEN, she honked AGAIN. And made some sort of angry gesture at the guy in front of her, who was well out of the way of other cars, mind you. But apparently it was HIS fault that she was a selfish tool.
The kicker? She could’ve used the second lane next to the guy because it was WIDE OPEN.
Lesson of the day: DO NOT DO.
I love the animation! I know so many people like that (e.g. my husband, but he would turn into the second lane without any gesture making). I get paranoid of becoming that person, so I usually stay in my lane until I have a car length’s worth of space to proceed.
Comment by kirida — May 30, 2008 @ 2:28 pm
Ha! This is ILLEGAL where I live! (NY) AND, even though it’s illegal, it still happens (of course) so on high touristy-type days, around the holidays, Fleet Week, etc., NYC has “Gridlock Alert Days.” Up here in the ‘burbs, most intersections are posted with “Do Not Block The Cross Street” signs for the galactically stupid/inconsiderate.
Comment by Paula — May 30, 2008 @ 2:29 pm
Dude. How did you learn to DO shit like that little dealie? So awesome.
I can’t believe the guy even moved up a couple of inches. I would have moved a couple of inches BACKWARDS.
Comment by Tessie — May 30, 2008 @ 2:38 pm
This is one of my huge pet peeves too. But OH MY GOD its existence has now become worth it solely due to your AMAZING illustration. We have signs everywhere saying “Do not block the box.” Do they help? NO.
Comment by Jess — May 30, 2008 @ 2:51 pm
I’m ALWAYS the person who desperately wants to ram them in the side because I have a green light dammit. I’ve been waiting for that green light. And now they’re IN THE WAY!
Comment by JMC — May 30, 2008 @ 2:52 pm
OH JUST READING THIS MAKES ME CAPSLOCK MAD.
Comment by slynnro — May 30, 2008 @ 2:53 pm
I think there is a special circle of hell for these people.
Comment by My Buddy Mimi — May 30, 2008 @ 2:54 pm
UGH! Jerks! People where I live are incredibly sucky drivers too (college students and OLD PEOPLE, not that I’m judgmental or anything). And it makes me so MAD!!!!
Comment by nonsoccermom — May 30, 2008 @ 3:22 pm
ANDDDDDDDD. If you don’t move forward and be the jerkwad in the middle of the intersection but rather choose to wait your turn like a normal CONSIDERATE person, the person behind you honks at you. Or your husband asks you why you aren’t moving forward. There is a reason I make Jeff drive everywhere.
Comment by Shannon — May 30, 2008 @ 4:34 pm
This crap drives me crazy too. It happens constantly where I live. I would say I’d like to see it made illegal, but hey, we don’t enforce the traffic laws we already have, nevermind getting any new ones.
Comment by deni — May 30, 2008 @ 6:19 pm
HOW DID YOU DO THAT GRAPHIC? You are awesome. Yet again.
OMG. I know! I KNOW! We have something called The Punishment Light near our house and people are always freaking DOING THAT at rush hour. GOD! Why? WHY?!
Comment by erin — May 30, 2008 @ 8:34 pm
dude, i LOVE the illustration. not only is it super sweet, but it MOVES! astounding!
also: i want to ram that person every. single. day. this is why i had to get a new job that did not require me to drive through traffic every day.
Comment by Alice — June 2, 2008 @ 10:33 am
this happens to me about 50 times a day here in l.a.!! i’m also the one who stays back until there’s room for me to go, then i get honked at! i have so many complaints to submit to your traffic elimination center!!
Comment by stacie — June 2, 2008 @ 12:03 pm
Also here in L.A., if you are the red car and you stay back and wait, the orange car will TURN RIGHT ON RED into the space you are waiting to clear, right in front of you. IT DRIVES ME INSANE.
Comment by Heidi — June 3, 2008 @ 5:00 pm