Houston, we have another problem
Come in, Control Tower. I repeat, come in Control Tower.
This is Control Tower. What is your situation?
We’ve got a non-functional right orbital lens cover.
Didn’t we have this exact same conversation three and a half years ago?
Affirmative.
How many hours of use has this lens cover seen?
Approximately two, sir.
TWO? Dammit.
That’s what we said.
What have you received as the error message?
We’re not sure yet what’s causing the malfunction, but it’s scratching the hell out of the retinal surface.
What about utilizing the manual lens cover?
Our professional opinion is that it would interfere with the central brain’s sense of pride.
That is irrelevant.
In addition, the manual lens cover has not been updated with the latest prescription specifications since 2002.
Well, I guess that leaves lasering off the offending lens material, boys.
Oh, hell no, sir!
Repeat that?
I mean, sir, no thank you, sir. We’ll find a workaround.
I thought you might. We’ll expect a status report at 0200 hours.
In other words, my contacts suck – AGAIN.
Oh no! That is the worst. I hope things improve soon.
Comment by Jess — April 2, 2008 @ 9:38 am
dude, i so know. manual lens cover = NOT AN OPTION, THX.
Comment by Alice — April 2, 2008 @ 9:42 am
I only use manual lens covers (don’t need them for much) because I can’t stand the thought of touching my eyeball with anything. It’s one of my quirks.
Comment by JMC — April 2, 2008 @ 12:20 pm
I use monthly contacts and I SWEAR that every month when I put in a brand spanking new pair it’s as if my eye balls are being scraped at with the grittiest sandpaper in the world. Stupid contacts and eyeballs. I so wish I had the guts to sign up for the laser option.
Comment by Emily — April 2, 2008 @ 12:29 pm
YAY for the LASAH!
I had to give up my contacts long ago even though I wore them for years. By the end of the day, I was MISERABLE. Like, every day.
Comment by Tessie — April 3, 2008 @ 7:45 am