Sporadic
Adios, January, you incredibly drawn-out-without-a-real-purpose-other-than-to-spread-misery month! And hello, February. You’re looking good: got a nice little holiday right in the middle, you seem warmer in spirit, and you have 2 fewer days. I like you.
Although Jason & I didn’t exercise as much as we had hoped for in January (why? Because it was cold and the bed was warm), we did do really well on eating better. Jason lost 11½ pounds, and I lost 4. Also, my pants are fitting better.
(An aside: on Tuesday, I had a lunch meeting and was ecstatic beyond all reason thrilled to discover they had ordered Jimmy John’s. But then I realized no one had called to take my order, and therefore, there was no food for me. There was sadness. The woman in charge of the meeting (also the woman who rescued me when my car doors were frozen), gave me her sandwich because she felt so bad. Her sandwich was turkey, tomatoes, lettuce and alfalfa sprouts. More sadness. BUT, silver lining! Only 200 calories!)
Anyway, I’ve got some questions I seriously need answers for:
Is there any way to avoid getting “lotion plug”? You know, the disgusting hardened glob of crusty lotion that blocks the lotion pump until it finally shoots free (along with 10 times as much lotion as desired) in a horrifying arc aimed directly at your new sweater?
How can godaddy.com afford a SuperBowl commercial? Don’t they sell their domains for super cheap?
Shouldn’t the company JoS. A. Bank be a bank instead of a men’s clothing store?
Why can’t the medical industry invent flavored albuterol for my inhaler?
Why can’t the paparazzi just let Britney get the help she obviously needs? The ambulance had to put black paper over the windows, for god’s sake.
And finally, should Flibberty & Jess have the first dance at their weddings be like this couple’s?
Oh man the lotion thing. I think TECHNICALLY the answer is “remember to close the lotion cap”, but I think we can all agree that’s never going to happen. I like to poke a hole in the Lotion Blockage with my fingernail as a preemptive strike.
And they CAN flavor Albuterol, they did it for AD when she had a respiratory infection! Why don’t they do it for inhalers? BULLSHIT!
Comment by Tessie — February 1, 2008 @ 12:55 pm
Ok, first of all, the chocolate covered pickle in your logo actually looks appetizing (says the preggo freak)
Ah, the lotion plug. I can’t avoid it either, and usually dig it out with a bobby-pin.
They flavor my kid’s Albuterol too–you may be on to something for the grown-up population. I’m thinking Tacos. Taco flavored Albuterol.
Comment by Saly — February 1, 2008 @ 12:59 pm
Tessie and Saly (welcome, Saly!),
OK, I’m so asking my pharmacy to flavor my albuterol. Mmm…taco-flavored albuterol. Or bacon, whichever.
And Saly, thank you for not saying the pickle looked…you know…less like a pickle and more like something else. Both Jason and my friend Michelle have commented on it. And I said, “Look, man. All I did was replace the banana portion of the image with the pickle!”
Comment by Shauna — February 1, 2008 @ 1:11 pm
Oh, HELL YES!!! to the first dance question. And be sure to video and post it as well.
I just had the lotion plug problem with shampoo when I was washing my daughters hair. Closing the lid DOES seem to be the solution, but it’s not something we can manage in our house.
GoDaddy’s domains ARE super cheap. They must sell large quantities of them. Actually, we have a few floating around here somewhere. Plus they have other services.
But back to the dance… yes, yes, oh my gosh yes!!
Comment by JMC — February 1, 2008 @ 1:31 pm
Oh my GOD you stole what was going to be our brilliant secret first dance surprise for our guests! Damn it!
Comment by Jess — February 1, 2008 @ 2:48 pm
I have No Idea about the lotion thing. I always get that. And I totally agree about Britney Spears. (Not that I ever follow celebrity news, ahem.) What is wrong with these people- leave her ALONE!
Comment by Sarah — February 1, 2008 @ 3:00 pm
Another lotion solution I think is to actually remember to use it at least every day. I only get the dreaded plug when I skip, which is pretty often. Apparently I like to wait to use lotion until it’s more of a medical necessity and it stings and burns as it enters my cracked skin. Prevention is overrated…
Comment by Gretchen — February 1, 2008 @ 4:47 pm
Hmmm…we use the lotion every day, but it doesn’t have a cap, since it’s a pump vs. a squirt bottle. And we actually use this lotion multiple times throughout the day, so apparently it has quick-drying capabilities, which I don’t care for.
Comment by Shauna — February 1, 2008 @ 5:03 pm
I hate the lotion plug, which seems to be universal. And I don’t know how to avoid it. But it’s gross, gross, gross.
Comment by blacksheeped — February 1, 2008 @ 10:47 pm
HAHA! Holy crap, I laughed so hard over that dance – worse, I would DEFINITELY do it at my wedding, it was AWESOME! Jess and Flib, GO FOR IT!
Comment by amber — February 2, 2008 @ 11:46 am
Great post, as usual. I really like the way you “hid” the dime in the ice cream. And the pickle doesn’t look like it was ever a banana. Just a giant pickle half covered in chocolate.
Remember the immortal words of Freud: “Sometimes a pickle is just a pickle.” He really said cigar, but that’s okay.
Comment by PixelPi — February 3, 2008 @ 2:30 am
Lotion plug! hahaha! I hate the lotion plug too. I have no suggestions. Just sympathies.
Great job on the eating better & lost poundage. For me, the eating better part is SO MUCH HARDER than the exercise part. It’s just so much harder (again, for me) to NOT do something than to do something. Does that make sense? Ah, nevermind.
Comment by Erin — February 3, 2008 @ 4:38 pm
I would love to do a dance like that for our wedding! I saw another one on the internets where the couple did the exact dance from Dirty Dancing. It was fantastic.
I think we’ll stick with the waltz.
Comment by Flibberty — February 4, 2008 @ 11:47 am
Lotion plug is solved by hot water, or safety pins. or you could like clean it out every time you use it. But I like my lotion to be an adventure…will there be a plug? Will there not? LET’S FIND OUT!
Comment by slynnro — February 5, 2008 @ 11:07 am