A case of the Mondays
After arriving at work today, I was elated to discover both my Monday meetings (one of which was scheduled during lunch) were canceled. I am vehemently against Monday meetings, lunch meetings, and while we’re on the subject, Friday afternoon meetings. In fact, I pretty much believe meetings are useless.
Without the soul-sucking meetings on my schedule, I finished off a giant writing project that took me less than an hour; the same project I spent nearly 4 hours on last Friday but was unable to complete because I was either interrupted by my phone, urgent emails, my coworkers or the constant cranked to 11 noise level in the office. In fact, my only interruption came from the fire alarm. Welcome to Workplace: Where Silence No Longer Exists!
But all pretense at office Quiet Time officially came to an end when one of my coworkers decided Workplace was now her own personal daycare. She brought in her two young boys (approximate ages: 5 and 7), who were left to their own devices in the kitchen area, which is not enclosed and is also, coincidentally, located right next to my also non-enclosed work space.
When they arrived, one of the boys was crying because his brother was looking at him. Coworker shoved some food into his scream-hole and immediately abandoned ship. After a few agonizing minutes of whining and arm punching, the boys settled into a routine. Older Boy now stares at me balefully while open-mouth-chewing some kind of super crunchy food product, while Younger Boy drops silverware on the countertop and repeats: “Where’s the garbage? Mom? Where’s the garbage, MOM? WHERE’S THE GARBAGE? MOM?” while somehow also running full-tilt all over the building.
I’m trying to think of my happy place, but the best I can come up with right now is an island filled with giant Tasers, like a revenge-themed Stonehenge.
I have a standing meeting every Monday at 7:15, BEAT THAT for suckiness.
Comment by Tessie — November 5, 2007 @ 1:23 pm
I was just going to write about loathing Friday afternoon meetings, until I read Tessie’s comment. Monday morning at 7:15am!? I have just woken up at that time. That is unbeatable.
Comment by Stephanie — November 5, 2007 @ 1:27 pm
Are you KIDDING? Who brings their kids in and then LEAVES THEM TO THEIR OWN DEVICES? If you have a daycare emergency, you’d better come prepared with food, games, DVDs, activities, and possibly a few tranquilizer darts, and your brats had better be in your office, dead silent, all day.
Comment by Jess — November 5, 2007 @ 1:44 pm
Tessie,
YOU WIN. That is the worst idea – ever.
Comment by Shauna — November 5, 2007 @ 1:44 pm
Why would co-worker think that this situation was a solution to whatever day-care, babysitter disaster occurred? Was it that imperative that she be at the office and not take a “personal day” or some shit, because I’m pretty sure that’s what those days are for.
Comment by Flibberty — November 5, 2007 @ 1:58 pm
I agree with Jess. You need to think of some evil revenge for the woman who brought her kids in. Perhaps a pet with rancid gas (aimed at her office) that has to accompany you to the office before a faux vet appt?
Comment by Shelly — November 5, 2007 @ 2:02 pm
Flibberty,
I’m not sure. Our morning announcements said she would be in the office at 10:30 and then be leaving “in the afternoon.”
I wish to have her hours.
But not her kids. They suck.
Comment by Shauna — November 5, 2007 @ 2:03 pm
People bringing their kids to work is one of my all time biggest pet peeves. Yes, I have two kids. No, they are not work-placed trained.
Tessie – that is the worst meeting time I’ve ever heard of – you totally win.
Comment by Shelly — November 5, 2007 @ 4:42 pm
Do you work in my office? The exact same thing happened here the other day. I’m in favor of topically absorbing Valium in the hand soap, but I was daydreaming about slipping a few pills into their sippy cups.
Comment by m.g. — November 5, 2007 @ 6:51 pm
Sounds like someone’s got a case of the Mondays!
Comment by Susan — November 5, 2007 @ 7:42 pm
Who does that? Bringing your kids and then leaving them to their own devices? At my old office my boss planned on bringing her NEWBORN TWINS into the office everyday instead of getting child care. I left before that became a reality.
Comment by Banana — November 6, 2007 @ 1:17 am
I’m with Shauna in that meetings are overall useless. I can beat the early Monday morning meeting (but then again I’m a morning person.) At our company, one of the regional managers would hold a mandatory conference call every Friday at 6:00 PM. Now that is down right mean!
Comment by Becky — November 6, 2007 @ 9:55 am
Oh meetings. You SUCK, meetings. Although sometimes you are okay when you get me out of working outside on horribly hot days. And also sometimes someone brings candy to the meeting, which gives me a purpose, to work on elevating my blood sugar. And sometimes, meetings, you kindly take place in a room with windows. And I endulge in elaborate daydreams about what else I might be doing. In general though, meetings, You Suck.
Comment by Erin — November 6, 2007 @ 10:39 am