Get your fax straight
Dear unknown person I curse daily,
My work number is not a fax. It is not one today and it was not one the previous 317 times. Call whomever you’re trying to reach and ask them for the correct fax number, dammit.
Dear generic Advil I found in the kitchen drawer at work,
Your stern message about not taking more than 6 pills in 24 hours? HAAAAAA. (That is the sound of my uterus laughing at you.)
Dear work computer,
That whole “greeting me with a blank screen and none of my documents when I logged on”? Did I look like I thought that was amusing? DID I???
Dear hair,
I know you’re acting stupid so that I’ll cut you, but I’m not falling for it. Yet. We’ll talk again later.
Dear closet and dresser,
You look empty now that I’ve donated some of your occupants. I’ll try to remedy that soon. And no more Grandma sweaters, I promise!
Dear internal body temperature,
KICK IT UP A NOTCH.
Dear bathtub,
You. Me. Tonight (or this weekend if madcap games of gin rummy interfere). Wear something hot, bubbly and scented like fruit.
Oh my god, that fax thing happened to me at my last work number. It is truly, truly, horrifying and went on for MONTHS.
Comment by Tessie — October 24, 2007 @ 12:12 pm
Do you think the unknown person actually thinks their faxes are going through and is befuddled about the complete lack of response?
Comment by Jess — October 24, 2007 @ 12:53 pm
Oh, that fax thing SUCKS. I hope your date with the bubbly one goes smashingly well!
Comment by Artemisia — October 24, 2007 @ 2:11 pm
Damn. This is funny. I especially like the note to your hair. Mine is doing the SAME THING! It’s a conspiricy! (is that how you spell that? I’m having spelling problems today. Ok, I’ve had spelling problems my whole life. I DON’T want to talk about it.)
I am going to cut it as soon as I get a Great Clips coupon. What a cheapass I am.
Comment by Erin — October 24, 2007 @ 8:45 pm
Are you really not supposed to take more than 6 Advil in 24 hours? I’m in big, BIG trouble if that is the case. Once I sprained my ankle and the doctor told me to save my money and just take like, four advil at a time. She said it was the same as taking the prescription stuff. And ever since, I don’t think I’ve had a good handle on what an appropriate amount of Advil is. Two? Three? Four? And now I’m even more confused.
I raided the work Advil yesterday too, by the way.
Comment by blacksheeped — October 25, 2007 @ 7:37 am
The hair thing – just make the hair appointment. That`s all my hair needs to have several consecutive good hair days. Also, didn`t you just have to opportunity for free haircuts on spa dayÉ
Comment by LoriD — October 25, 2007 @ 9:49 am
LoriD,
Yes, I did just have the opportunity for a free haircut! But the hair, it KNOWS. Right now it’s the longest it’s been in awhile and it finally looks nice when pulled back into a ponytail. But with Static Electricity Season just around the corner, I’m thinking of cutting it.
My hair always looks great once I’ve scheduled a haircut, too. It’s like when your car’s acting up and you make an appt. and then it starts running fine.
Comment by Shauna — October 25, 2007 @ 10:33 am