The main reason I am not a morning person
[I go downstairs to sit on the couch next to Jason.]
Jason: Hey! Let me try to take off your glasses with my toes!
Me: What? No.
Jason: Yes. I need the practice.
Me: The practice? For what? A future career as an armless bomb defuser?
Jason: Maybe. My toes are very skilled.
Me: You’re not touching me with those monkey toes.
Jason: Well then, maybe I’ll touch something else. Your robe’s agape.
Me: No.
Jason: If you don’t let me, I’ll use my left foot. That one’s clumsier.
Me, sighing: Fine. I can’t believe I’m letting you do this.
[Jason uses his toes to pull one side of my glasses off, poking me in the eye.]
Me: Ow!
Jason: Stop laughing!
Me: This is insane.
[Jason pulls the glasses completely off and presents them back to me...WITH HIS TOES]
Jason: Your glasses…
Me: You are such a freak.
I would not let my husband touch me with his toes unless they were holding a TEN FOOT POLE. Ugg, boy toes are GROSS.
Comment by Tessie — September 25, 2007 @ 11:01 am
Even a morning person would have a little trouble handling boy toes in the face.
“Your robe’s agape” = hilarious.
Comment by Swistle — September 25, 2007 @ 11:11 am
I was going to say exactly what Swistle said… “Your robe’s agape” totally cracked me up.
Comment by Jess — September 25, 2007 @ 11:51 am
Someone telling me my robe was agape first thing in the morning would result in a smack in the face. You behaved much more admirably!
Comment by Artemisia — September 25, 2007 @ 12:48 pm
No toes, never. You are a better woman than me. Toes… GROSS.
Comment by Erin — September 25, 2007 @ 3:51 pm
Your man really knows how to keep the romance alive, no?
Comment by Shelly — September 25, 2007 @ 6:42 pm
Actually, neither of us could stop laughing. It was probably the hardest I’ve laughed in a long time. I don’t get freaked out by toes, only how freakishly dexterous Jason’s are. He can pick up a tiny piece of paper with them – it’s crazy.
Comment by Shauna — September 26, 2007 @ 8:35 am
[...] Definitely a quote from Jason. Do you know how weird it is to be folding laundry with him, when something falls out of the dryer onto the floor, and without missing a beat in either his clothes folding or his conversation, he uses his toes to pick up the fallen item and replace it into the laundry basket? Well, it’s very weird. [...]
Pingback by Pickles & Dimes » Goofy Google searches – part XIII — March 19, 2008 @ 9:35 am